"Are they fake?"
When someone you know and love or simply know is diagnosed with cancer it’s hard to know what to say and what not to say. Even dealing with cancer myself, it’s always hard to know what to say but I think more important is to know what not to say. Here are my personal list of banal platitudes I have been subject to: “You’ve got this!” Do you even realize how dismissive this sounds? “You rock the bald look!” Really? Because I had great hair. Even if I had bad hair, it was mine and THIS wasn’t my choice. No, I don’t look like the chick from Aliens, Sinead O’Connor, or G.I. Jane. I look like a cancer patient who is fighting for my life and going bald is a horrible side effect, not a fashion statement. “You have to think positive.” -or- "Positive mental attitude!" Being told to “think positive” when you ask me how I am, and I explain the seriousness of my illness, what I go through with treatment, my prognosis, and my fears is not me being negative. It’s me being real an